September 11, 2011
Is it really 10 years since our world changed forever? In some ways it seems like a very long time ago. Time does indeed heal the rawness that this day brought. But at the same time, just like everyone else, I will never forget where I was, what I was doing, who told me, etc on that fateful day. When I remember it's almost as if times has not passed and the pain tumbles over my heart and pours out of me.
10 years ago I had only been married about a month and a half. I was a preschool teacher at Parkcrest Assembly of God teaching 16 three year olds all day long. The job was incredibly demanding and hard but the kids were the reason I went every day. I remember hearing from a crying mother as she dropped off her son, Mason, that a plane had hit the 1st tower, then a few moments later a 2nd plane. We were under attack. Our classroom was filled with anxiety that day. The three year olds didn't understand what terrorists were or even where New York City was but they could see the adults in their lives crying and fearful over the events. I remember choosing at that moment to always be truthful with my future kids. I sat those innocent three year olds down and tried to explain to them in words that were not frightening about what happened and why we adults were all upset. I remember telling them that some bad people had hurt some nice people and it caused us adults a lot of sadness. I remember they asked questions, like who were these people (I had no idea), and where it was at, and if they were going to be ok. As I sit here and remember I can't help but wonder where those three year olds are now, 13-14 years old and what they might remember from that day.
Now 10 years later my life has changed significantly. I am now a mother, I stay at home, and of course we have a little more money then we did back then... ;o) But now my heart hurts not for myself today but for all those families who have to endure another anniversary. The kids who will never know their Mommy's, Daddy's, Aunts or Uncles. The husbands and wives whose futures were taken from them. Most of all I think of the Mom's today. Who lost their children by the hand of someone else. The pain they must still experience literally takes my breath away. My greatest joy, gift and challenge is my son. I can't fathom a life without him and so many parents have to do just that because of 9/11. I also think of the families of those who carried out the attacks. My heart aches for them as well. They lost a child that day too. They have to live with the fact that their child killed thousands and no matter their beliefs they are living each anniversary with people remembering their joy, their gift as a murderer. My heart aches for them as well.
But I am again comforted and hopeful because I know the one who holds the world in His hands. He saw these horrible events happen, He was with the people in the towers, He was with the people on each airplane, He was with the terrorists urging them to hear His voice just one last time. God never told us our lives would be easy or filled with puppy dogs and roses. He promises He will be there, constant through all of it. I praise Him for that. I praise Him for the gift of today and although our emotions are tied to the horrible events of that day 10 years ago, today most people will remember Him and seek Him. And I look to Him for peace and comfort for all those families and friends who lost someone they loved.
These verses are true everyday but today they give me strength.
God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.
(Ps 46:1)
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. (Jhn 14.27)
Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this. (Ps 37:1-5)
My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life. (Ps 119.50)
I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. (Jhn 16.33)
The Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen and protect you from the evil one. (2 Thes 3:3)
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. (Ps 147:3)
10 years ago I had only been married about a month and a half. I was a preschool teacher at Parkcrest Assembly of God teaching 16 three year olds all day long. The job was incredibly demanding and hard but the kids were the reason I went every day. I remember hearing from a crying mother as she dropped off her son, Mason, that a plane had hit the 1st tower, then a few moments later a 2nd plane. We were under attack. Our classroom was filled with anxiety that day. The three year olds didn't understand what terrorists were or even where New York City was but they could see the adults in their lives crying and fearful over the events. I remember choosing at that moment to always be truthful with my future kids. I sat those innocent three year olds down and tried to explain to them in words that were not frightening about what happened and why we adults were all upset. I remember telling them that some bad people had hurt some nice people and it caused us adults a lot of sadness. I remember they asked questions, like who were these people (I had no idea), and where it was at, and if they were going to be ok. As I sit here and remember I can't help but wonder where those three year olds are now, 13-14 years old and what they might remember from that day.
Now 10 years later my life has changed significantly. I am now a mother, I stay at home, and of course we have a little more money then we did back then... ;o) But now my heart hurts not for myself today but for all those families who have to endure another anniversary. The kids who will never know their Mommy's, Daddy's, Aunts or Uncles. The husbands and wives whose futures were taken from them. Most of all I think of the Mom's today. Who lost their children by the hand of someone else. The pain they must still experience literally takes my breath away. My greatest joy, gift and challenge is my son. I can't fathom a life without him and so many parents have to do just that because of 9/11. I also think of the families of those who carried out the attacks. My heart aches for them as well. They lost a child that day too. They have to live with the fact that their child killed thousands and no matter their beliefs they are living each anniversary with people remembering their joy, their gift as a murderer. My heart aches for them as well.
But I am again comforted and hopeful because I know the one who holds the world in His hands. He saw these horrible events happen, He was with the people in the towers, He was with the people on each airplane, He was with the terrorists urging them to hear His voice just one last time. God never told us our lives would be easy or filled with puppy dogs and roses. He promises He will be there, constant through all of it. I praise Him for that. I praise Him for the gift of today and although our emotions are tied to the horrible events of that day 10 years ago, today most people will remember Him and seek Him. And I look to Him for peace and comfort for all those families and friends who lost someone they loved.
These verses are true everyday but today they give me strength.
God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.
(Ps 46:1)
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. (Jhn 14.27)
Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this. (Ps 37:1-5)
My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life. (Ps 119.50)
I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. (Jhn 16.33)
The Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen and protect you from the evil one. (2 Thes 3:3)
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. (Ps 147:3)
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